'Oh man, I must keep the water going in the shower for as long as possible to maximize the effect my expensive conditioner will have on my scalp and hair follicle.'
Totally. You do realize that every iota of water you've just wasted on 'maximizing your conditioner' would have accumulated enough in the few seconds you had it blasting heat and pressure on your back and neck to save a small village from walking 25 miles to get to a well....a well dug forty seven years ago, replete with disease, packed with dead and crawling insects, and much more mud than water....much more.
'I got this shit for free! Well, it was practically. It was on sale for half price and the manufacturers made a special extra large bottle so I got 50% more. Steal. Steal of a deal.'
The water's turned cold, you've been in too long. Did you know rats are excellent swimmers? I've seen one twice....a brown rat. Cute. Fearless. curious. Good combination, no?
'Did he have a nice smile?'
Why must everything be about boys? They are all the same you know...
'I know. But. I just like 'em.'
You sir, are obsessed. Or bored. Christ, keep busy. You have things to do, things to focus on.
'Yeah, but there could potentially be boys when we're focusing and you must have soft hair for when that happens. Even if it looks funny right now and I'll never quite understand your motives.'
No motive. Just trying to remind myself everyday that til it grows...you are not ready. A simple string on the finger, note on the fridge or hair on the head.
'You're a fucking weirdo.'
Takes one to know one.
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