Part 5...

I don't want to be addicted to drugs anymore. I feel good right now, and guilty and lonely and maybe a little itchy. I feel a tiny bit itchy...and scratchy...like I'm one but inside always two. I don't want my life to exist only for the next cough. I don't want to be complacent, apathetic. So much garbage...I quit picking it up. All over a boy, I'm quite fucked up. "He's just not that in to you..." why did that come a year late. Stealing a nice cozy place in hell, pushing everyone away, it's not enough to pray for mercy...I've tried. Nothing helps ease this pit in my stomach, always tense and on alert. So sad...too bad...you've wasted too much time thinking.